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dagolfer18

Girlfriends

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I’ve got two girls in mind that are very possible girlfriends. They’re both nice, and they both seem really chill when I’m around them. Any tips on how to win one over?

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Do the girls have activities outside of school?   What are their ambitions, future plans?  What do you have in common with each?   As Erik stated,  it may not be up to you.   Be yourself.  

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3 hours ago, dagolfer18 said:

I’ve got two girls in mind that are very possible girlfriends. They’re both nice, and they both seem really chill when I’m around them. Any tips on how to win one over?

Why settle on one?....be a PLAYA and date both.

If you decide you only want 1 GF....let your brother date the other gal.😂

If the girls are too "chill" around you....that might not be great.....you may only be viewed as a 'friend"...but what do I know.

Hopefully @FlyingAce chimes in and provides a more useful female perspective/advice.

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Edited by Mr22putt

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13 hours ago, dennyjones said:

Do the girls have activities outside of school?   What are their ambitions, future plans?  What do you have in common with each?   As Erik stated,  it may not be up to you.   Be yourself.  

This. Be Yourself. 

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2 minutes ago, boogielicious said:

This. Be Yourself. 

100%. It’s an old saying but so true. The last thing you want to do is fake and be someone else to get the girl. You want to find someone who likes the real you. Nothing worse than having false conceptions and expectations. Better to show “warts and all” and truly get to know someone. 

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In addition to the previous posts, if one of them smokes, pick the other one.

I had some nice girl friends back in the day. When I ran into the one who wanted  to be my "best friend", I married her. That was 50 years ago. 

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Good advice by and large . . . a coupla thoughts:

1.  To the first point that she has a say in all this too--that's true not only at the basic 'hands off' (unless she's eager) physical respect, act like a gentleman level, but also more generally.  One, the other, or the next attractive girl you encounter may take a look at you, a couple of dates, even a test drive, and decide she's not interested.  That's life.  As my mother used to say to me half a century ago, 'better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all' (it's a quote from some poem).  Let's see, you're an 18 handicap.  I'll bet somebody breaks your heart before you break 80.  At least once.  Like I said, that's life.

2.  If you're lucky enough that one of them shows some interest in, say, going out to a driving range, well, be a cheerleader, not a coach.  Find stuff to laugh about.  The noble and ancient traditions of the spiritually profound game of golf can wait for another day.  So can swing tips and strength building drills.  If you get in a putting contest, or something goofy, well, girls have been letting guys win at stuff like that for ages, and nowadays, I understand that turnabout is fair play.  And, remember, if she's game for a couple of hours in one of your pastimes, you owe her a couple of hours in a yoga class or cooking lessons or whatever her deal is.

3.  'Be yourself' is great advice.  But don't, as my daughter once put it, 'fly your freak flag' (still not sure what that means, but the guy disappeared from the radar).

So, good luck.  Enjoy the highs.  God knows you'll suffer through the lows.

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On 1/3/2020 at 11:07 AM, DwightC said:

Let's see, you're an 18 handicap.  I'll bet somebody breaks your heart before you break 80.  At least once.  Like I said, that's life.

Oh, I’ve been friendzoned before. By four different girls. Each friendzone was within a week or two of me getting her number. All of them were really nice about it too, except for one. But, I’ve gotten another number. It’s been four months, and I haven’t gotten anything resembling a friendzone, except when I invited her to homecoming in October. If I remember correctly, she said something along the lines of, “Aww, I appreciate the gesture, but I’d like to keep it a bit more friendly until I get to know you better.”

Edited by dagolfer18

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30 minutes ago, dagolfer18 said:

If I remember correctly, she said something along the lines of, “Aww, I appreciate the gesture, but I’d like to keep it a bit more friendly until I get to know you better.”

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On 1/2/2020 at 5:19 PM, dagolfer18 said:

I’ve got two girls in mind that are very possible girlfriends. They’re both nice, and they both seem really chill when I’m around them. Any tips on how to win one over?

My tip:  Don't get advice on a golf forum.

 

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21 minutes ago, Cantankerish said:

My tip:  Don't get advice on a golf forum.

 

Hmmm...good advice. This isn’t just a golf forum though 😃

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First of all, you never let on how much you like a girl. "Oh, Debbie. Hi." Two, you always call the shots. "Kiss me. You won't regret it." Now three, act like wherever you are, that's the place to be. "Isn't this great?" Four, when ordering food, you find out what she wants, then order for the both of you. It's a classy move. "Now, the lady will have the linguini and white clam sauce, and a Coke with no ice." And five, now this is the most important. When it comes down to making out, whenever possible, put on side one of Led Zeppelin IV.

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I can give u a lecture on the matter... but I will just point out the basics. 

Ask both girls out or one at a time... your choice. 

If the girl is interested in you she will make it easy for you to date her, you will be equals on the date and both of you will make an effort to have an amazing evening. Just go out to have a drink. Ask her questions about herself, tease her a little bit and just keep the conversation light and fun. Be yourself and don´t hold back, girls love man that are MAN and are not afraid to speak their truth and go after what they want. 

If the girl is not interested is going to be hard to date her, if you manage to go out with her your are not going to be equals, she is not going to make an affort and you will be force to carry all the talking and that´s not fun at all. 
There are also girls who will date you just because is better than staying at home watching netflix, free meal or drinks are far better. You will never get anything from them physicaly speaking, they are going to treat you as a friend and don´t let you kiss her because is "to soon" or "she wants to take it slow" or "she never kiss on the 1st date" (BS!!).
In this cases my advice is to delete her number and move on with another girl, only date girls that shows real interest in you and makes and effort to win you over too.

Good luck!      

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19 hours ago, dagolfer18 said:

Hmmm...good advice. This isn’t just a golf forum though 😃

How old are you?....I think you said your brother is 13...so are you 15?

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3 minutes ago, Mr22putt said:

How old are you?....I think you said your brother is 13...so are you 15?

I’m 16.

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29 minutes ago, dagolfer18 said:

I’m 16.

16 is a great age...have lots of fun.

HS and university were some of the best years of my life.

Attracting the gals is a numbers game...just like sales....you need to keep your 'funnel' wide and deep....you can't reasonably expect to close a deal with only 2 prospects.

You also need to qualify...lol....not all the girls want a BF.....a few simple questions will allow you to determine if these gals are in the 'buying cycle"...if they aren't.....take them off your list...no need to waste your energy on the 'tire kickers'.

You'll know within 2 minutes if a girl is interested in you.

They say in a job interview that the interviewer knows in 2 minutes if they are going to hire you or recommend you to the next stage in the interview process.

Oh ya...one last piece of advice....practice your driver/tee shot a lot...all the chicks dig the LONG BALL.😂

You seem like a nice young man...and I think you're quite popular on this forum...why?

Two words...you seem humble and honest....you don't need to lie about any falsehoods about your golf game and don't need to brag about anything.....and you also take care of your little brother...kudos.

Have fun at school and golf...work hard...play hard.

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