How do you discipline your equipment

[paininthenuts]

My golf clubs had been behaving quite well until last weekend, when my golf club held the annual championships. It was a medal event held over two days. Despite the fact my swing was easily as good as a pro, the golf balls were flying all over the place, but rarely where I aimed them. In fact, I suspect the balls may have been in cahoots with the clubs. As a result of the equipment's poor behavior I was made to look like a complete idiot. As tempted as I am to smash up my clubs and throw the golf balls in my local canal, I can't afford it. I have considered putting a radio in the garage and leaving it on all night so the clubs don't get any sleep, but fear this may backfire when I need them next. The best thing I could come up with is naming and shaming them on THIS forum. So Mr Golf Clubs, one more game like last weekend and I am taking up chess, and you will be sold to a lesser player

 

BE WARNED !!

[imsys0042]

Clubs that let me down on the course don't get wiped off.   They can stay dirty and think about the evil that they have done.

[Patch]

18 minutes ago, paininthenuts said:

My golf clubs had been behaving quite well until last weekend, when my golf club held the annual championships. It was a medal event held over two days. Despite the fact my swing was easily as good as a pro, the golf balls were flying all over the place, but rarely where I aimed them. In fact, I suspect the balls may have been in cahoots with the clubs. As a result of the equipment's poor behavior I was made to look like a complete idiot. As tempted as I am to smash up my clubs and throw the golf balls in my local canal, I can't afford it. I have considered putting a radio in the garage and leaving it on all night so the clubs don't get any sleep, but fear this may backfire when I need them next. The best thing I could come up with is naming and shaming them on THIS forum. So Mr Golf Clubs, one more game like last weekend and I am taking up chess, and you will be sold to a lesser player

 

BE WARNED !!

Standing them up, upside down, in the deepest bug infested part of my garage always seemed to work. (The upside down part is important) This while their bag rested comfortably in the guest room............with the tv remote. 

On those occassions when the bug infested corner didn't seem to work, the there was always the daily "dog poop pick up"  where I would give each iron a turn followed by a icy bath. Before I got to the metal woods the problem was solved. 

Edited August 15, 2016 by Patch

[newtogolf]

The greatest punishment I can unleash on my clubs is to take them out the next day and make then endure another day of my inconsistent swing.  

I've already had GCPS (golf club protective services) remove two sets of clubs from my home due to placing them under such abuse but I have underground ways of getting new sets of golf clubs to abuse, err I mean use.  

[CarlSpackler]

I just call them a bad name.

[David in FL]

Ha!

I've got a dark storage cabinet in the back, dim recesses of my garage where misbehaving putters are banished to serve timeout.  After a week or two in "the hole", they generally return to an acceptable standard of behavior.

 

[paininthenuts]

7 minutes ago, CarlSpackler said:

I just call them a bad name.

Sorry, that doesn't work, I tried it many times over the said weekend. I had even suggested to them that they were born without a father (if you know what I mean)

Edited August 15, 2016 by paininthenuts

[Jeremie Boop]

I dramatically drop them to the ground after they produce the offending shot and look down at them disapprovingly. After that I pick them up and whisper "I'm sorry baby, I'll never do that to you again."

[JxQx]

In a past life mine used to make this weird helicopter noise, then all of the sudden they would perform better.

[Patch]

Oh yeah, I forgot. Sometimes, when on the course I would take the offending club(s), and  "ground" them for the rest of the round. 

[onkey]

2 minutes ago, Patch said:

Oh yeah, I forgot. Sometimes, when on the course I would take the offending club(s), and  "ground" them for the rest of the round. 

I usually give my 3 wood one opportunity to impress me for the day.  If he fails me, he stays in the bag with his head cover on, in the position of shame for the rest of the round.

[Patch]

34 minutes ago, Jeremie Boop said:

I dramatically drop them to the ground after they produce the offending shot and look down at them disapprovingly. After that I pick them up and whisper "I'm sorry baby, I'll never do that to you again."

They own you....

[phillyk]

12 minutes ago, onkey said:

I usually give my 3 wood one opportunity to impress me for the day.  If he fails me, he stays in the bag with his head cover on, in the position of shame for the rest of the round.

That sounds like my driver! Haha

My putter has taken the most beatings but because of that, its disciplined enough to know not to f**k up again!

[mcanadiens]

I'm trying my best to move away from club throwing. Not perfect yet, but real, honest throws are down a lot this year. So I do the dramatic drop off mishits. Unlike @Jeremie Boop, I don't say I'm sorry. Did super well with my god-awful round in Norwalk. Half the friggin bag would have been tossed a year ago, but no real throws on Sunday morning.

The other thing I do, that I need to stop is thumping the club on the floor. It's not really a disciplinary action. More like a nervous habit of mine. I'm sort of thinking that the driver shaft incident of a couple of weeks ago has something do with this.

[CarlSpackler]

57 minutes ago, paininthenuts said:

Sorry, that doesn't work, I tried it many times over the said weekend. I had even suggested to them that they were born without a father (if you know what I mean)

Nothing works. Clubs are moody. That's just the way it is. 

57 minutes ago, Jeremie Boop said:

I dramatically drop them to the ground after they produce the offending shot and look down at them disapprovingly. After that I pick them up and whisper "I'm sorry baby, I'll never do that to you again."

For the love of... Don't give in to them!!!

[pganapathy]

I tend to get very cranky and mutter or sometimes even talk loudly.  Lots of swear words but a lot of them directed at myself.  When I am in Coorg, I will occasionally use some other clubs but mostly it is just the swearing and then some clubs stay in the bag but don't get used when they misbehave

[Rainmaker]

You are on the right track with throwing an offending club into the canal or breaking it over your knee . .but you have to make sure your other clubs see you do this.  Too many times we just throw the club into the lake immediately while our bag is strapped to the cart facing the other way.  The other clubs have no idea what just happened - for all they know, the 6i just won an all expenses paid trip to the Bahamas.  No - let them see what happens to clubs that can't behave. 

 

[Brad W]

When I played 30 years ago, on my first full size par 5 course, I threw my nine into the water hazard and walked off the course.  That was the last time I played golf until this year.  I seriously rage quit :) , but I showed that nine iron a thing or two.  I bet its wishing it paid attention during swim lessons

This picture seemed suitable for the conversation...

Edited August 15, 2016 by Brad W