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David Feherty Sunday at the Shark Shootout when Charley Hoffman chunked his chip: "If he would have hit any farther behind that ball we would have had to add it to yesterday's score" 😂

I read it from Lewis Grizzard, but he probably modified it from somewhere else: Playing St Andrews badly, and missing a shot with a club the caddie suggested, the player said, "You must be t

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David Feherty Sunday at the Shark Shootout when Charley Hoffman chunked his chip:

"If he would have hit any farther behind that ball we would have had to add it to yesterday's score" 😂

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"Augusta's 17th green was so fast it could have been bikini waxed".

Gary McCord said that on air, and was promptly banned from The Master for saying it. Don't think he has ever been back, or even misses not being there. 

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Golf is the closest game to the game we call life. You get bad breaks from good shots; you get good breaks from bad shots – But you have to play the ball where it lies.
~Bobby Jones

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“Swing hard in case you hit the ball”

Give me golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.”  - Jack Benny

”score is everything, nothing else matters”. - an idiot

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A few  of my fave's ...

- After teeing it up too high and hitting a short moon ball off the top edge of the crown, a woman in my group once said ... "like an elephants butt ... high and stinky"

- after making a 40 footer with break, an old guy I was paired up with mumbled  ... "like it had eyes"

- after shaking his head in disbelief, my brother let this one go in our foursome after I ran a 6 foot putt 7 ft past the hole ... "on the greens, you have the touch of a rapist"

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"Golf Should Be Played. Not Watched"

                                Unknown

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  • 2 months later...

As a greens keeper was watering the green and waves us on to hit:

Me: ‘Dad, do you think these guys hit with a ball very often?’

Dad: ‘ Probably not ...the green is the safest place on a golf course.’

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"Who needs fitness, when you've got great equipment?" -- John Daly. 

Saw this in Golf Digest and it made me giggle. Golf is just plain more entertaining with John Daly involved. 

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A "friend's" observation after I hit a particularly short drive:

"I see your problem.  You are standing too close to the ball ... after you hit it."

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