Bad attitude, bad behavior, bad day golfing.

[Patch]

I think those amateurs who lose their patience when golfing are not really playing golf for the right reasons. Some play so they have a reason to lose their patience. Others take the game way too seriously to enjoy it. Not saying I never lost my temper on a golf course, but I can say that it was several decades ago that I did lose it.

I have always maintained that no matter how poorly one might play, there was still more good to take from the poor round than bad. Last week I missed two 3' putts that would have gave me a 78. However, earlier in the round I made some really nice putts that put me in a position to shoot a 78. One of those putts was a double breaking 15 footer. You play the game, and enjoy what you are doing.

I see people with golf clubs get mad quite often. These folks are not golfers They are for the most part, (for me) cheap, laughable entertainment. The fact that paid a fee to entertain me is a plus. Of course,  I am not talking about the professionals. The pros are entertainers period. Regardless of how they play.

[mcanadiens]

It's a real easy thing for some people to handle anger. Then there's the rest of us. You just got to find ways of managing it. I'm way better than I was just a few years ago and there's still a million miles to go with it. It really does suck when you end up breaking something. Especially when the budget is too restricted to simply replace whatever it was. I've had a casualty or two in the past and it does check you a bit after you flame out. The last time (a couple of years ago now), I was hitting pitches with a 9I for a month before I could replace the PW that sleeps with the fishes. That was the last legitimate club throw. I'll admit to doing a sort of exaggerated drop now. The thought being to get the club out of my hands before I have a chance. For those who just shake their fingers, you'll never understand. I can't really worry about them.

[rob0225]

I think what a man does when he is angry over a non-serious situation(such as golf) shows a restricted level of what he would do when he is really mad over something serious. Honestly, if you will break a club just because you hit one bad shot, even when you are a 22 handicap, I don't care if it was one time or not, you need to see a psychiatrist. If at your playing level you will pissed about missing one green, I'd love to see what happens if someone cuts you off, or someone rear ends you. Honestly I'm a 5 handicap and I miss plently of greens, yet I've never ever altered or damaged a club in anger. I think it also shows how low one's stress tolerance is. If one bad shot causes you to flip, that's pretty scary. It reminds me of the "going postal" incident in the 80s, where mailmen killed their bosses and co-workers, merely because they thought they were being stressed too much. Are you kidding me? Being a mail-man is stressfull? Imagine what the troops in Iraq are going through when they go to help a man who's been shot, and they find it's their best friend.

He doesn't need to see a psychiatrist.  People get angry, they get over it. Not everything means someone is a psychopath that's about to go on a shooting rage.

[Fourputt]

Quote:

Originally Posted by st0wgolf08

I think what a man does when he is angry over a non-serious situation(such as golf) shows a restricted level of what he would do when he is really mad over something serious. Honestly, if you will break a club just because you hit one bad shot, even when you are a 22 handicap, I don't care if it was one time or not, you need to see a psychiatrist. If at your playing level you will pissed about missing one green, I'd love to see what happens if someone cuts you off, or someone rear ends you. Honestly I'm a 5 handicap and I miss plently of greens, yet I've never ever altered or damaged a club in anger. I think it also shows how low one's stress tolerance is. If one bad shot causes you to flip, that's pretty scary. It reminds me of the "going postal" incident in the 80s, where mailmen killed their bosses and co-workers, merely because they thought they were being stressed too much. Are you kidding me? Being a mail-man is stressfull? Imagine what the troops in Iraq are going through when they go to help a man who's been shot, and they find it's their best friend.

He doesn't need to see a psychiatrist.  People get angry, they get over it. Not everything means someone is a psychopath that's about to go on a shooting rage.

Yes but reasonable adults learn to control their anger.  And they learn when it's appropriate to let off some steam and when it isn't.  Sorry to say be golf isn't life and death.  Most players learn that early on, and they learn to temper their temper tantrums.  Those who don't learn that lose a lot of friends and wind up playing a lot of golf by themselves.

There were a couple of guys in our men's club who had control issues, and they had trouble finding anyone to play with.  One was a club thrower, and while he was a bit dangerous, I tried to stay on his good side because he was always offloading nearly new clubs for cheap because "they didn't work right".  This guy would go through 4 drivers a year, and the heaviest use they got was helicoptering up the fairway.

[Jon Hoover]

A couple years ago I was on 18 and we had been waiting on theses slow people all day and after standing and waiting in the fairway for what seemed like an eternity I super chunked the shot... I was pissed but I didn't want to slam my club into the ground because its not the grounds fault so I decided that if I hit the wheel of the cart it should be a harmless way of venting some frustration. So I hit the wheel and snapped the head right off, that was the last time I ever slammed a club out of frustration, ended up only costing $25 to buy the same iron off ebay, but a lesson was learned and now I may get frustrated but I never take it out on my equipment. You live and you learn.

[rkim291968]

To OP, all I can say is, if this was only the first time, you are far better than most of us.   Too bad about damaging your bag & club.   Even that can't be that bad.  It gives you an excuse to buy even a purer shaft.

[Cupcakus]

Wow, this thread was resurrected from 6 years ago!

Just yesterday I was teeing off on the second hole of my local 9 hole executive I practice at almost every day after work, I always pull my tee shot left of the green there... *ALWAYS* it's super frustrating, I think maybe it's an optical illusion or something how the hole is set up and I always line up left of it or something.  I hit a ton of bad shots, but hitting the same bad shot every day made me toss my wedge into the air yesterday.  It happens to everyone I think.

[reallygood]

At some local course, I started off pretty hot by my standards, and this carried through the front 9. Starting on 10, I can't explain what changed, but it's like I've never swung a club before. I posted my two worst holes of the round on 10 and 11. Got to 12, hit a decent drive, then I just couldn't move the ball more than 20 yards. Frustrated, I kept whacking it, walking up to it, whacking it again, swinging harder each successive time. By this point, I'm angrier than I can remember being in recent memory at anything. I'm typically very mild tempered by nature, so this came out of nowhere. I'm gripping my club with both hands hard as ever, ready to make it pay. I couldn't do that to something I paid for, so I loudly exclaim my displeasure with some language and helicopter my club with everything I have. I walked to get it and bring it back to the cart to help cool down and go home. Good thing I wasn't with friends. No one wants to put up with that shit

[Duff McGee]

Hello to all the self righteous posters. Hope you enjoyed puffing yourselves up and feeling superior by making someone feel worse when they came here for support.

[ryan772]

I had bought an old set of clubs at a garage sale for 5 bucks and used to bring one of the clubs with me so that when i got pissed i could snap it throw it in the pond or whatever made me feel better.

[gregsandiego]

I had bought an old set of clubs at a garage sale for 5 bucks and used to bring one of the clubs with me so that when i got pissed i could snap it throw it in the pond or whatever made me feel better.

I think you have the right idea - turning your frustration into fun. I get my "revenge" by switching to a range ball when the hole gets long.

[Fourputt]

Hello to all the self righteous posters. Hope you enjoyed puffing yourselves up and feeling superior by making someone feel worse when they came here for support.

I never joined TST to be part of an anger management support group.  I figure we're mostly supposed to be adults here who are able to maintain some semblance of control over our emotions.

[Duff McGee]

I never joined TST to be part of an anger management support group.  I figure we're mostly supposed to be adults here who are able to maintain some semblance of control over our emotions.

Why trash him though? It's not like we caught him or he came on here bragging about it. Why kick someone when they are down and confessing? It's like someone coming on here being like "I'm just not spending enough time with my family and I'm torn up about it. Please tell me if any of you have had this experience and what you did to change." Then we all tell him to grow up and not be such a horrible father and that he should be ashamed of himself. It's messed up.

[Fourputt]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fourputt

I never joined TST to be part of an anger management support group.  I figure we're mostly supposed to be adults here who are able to maintain some semblance of control over our emotions.

Why trash him though? It's not like we caught him or he came on here bragging about it. Why kick someone when they are down and confessing?

It's like someone coming on here being like "I'm just not spending enough time with my family and I'm torn up about it. Please tell me if any of you have had this experience and what you did to change."

Then we all tell him to grow up and not be such a horrible father and that he should be ashamed of himself. It's messed up.

What else are you supposed to tell him?  We aren't psychologists, we're golfers.  If he wants therapy then he came to the wrong place.

It's time to learn to man up and admit that you have no business throwing a temper tantrum just because you hit a bad shot or two.  Life is full of far worse tragedies than that.  Something that has been written many times is that one significant part of the game of golf is learning to manage and deal with adversity without losing your cool.  It's something that most golfers have to figure out for themselves.

The only thing I can tell a player with anger issues is to learn to grin and bear it.  If that doesn't work then I figure there are lots of other players who actually know how to have fun on the course, and I'll seek them out instead.

[Duff McGee]

What else are you supposed to tell him?  We aren't psychologists, we're golfers.  If he wants therapy then he came to the wrong place.   It's time to learn to man up and admit that you have no business throwing a temper tantrum just because you hit a bad shot or two.  Life is full of far worse tragedies than that.  Something that has been written many times is that one significant part of the game of golf is learning to manage and deal with adversity without losing your cool.  It's something that most golfers have to figure out for themselves.   The only thing I can tell a player with anger issues is to learn to grin and bear it.  If that doesn't work then I figure there are lots of other players who actually know how to have fun on the course, and I'll seek them out instead.

I disagree. It is not an either or proposition. It's not "be a jerk to him or tell him he is awesome." One option would be not to post anything in response.

[Oz Max]

I don't mind people venting and getting heated up a bit, it just shows they care. What I don't like is people getting bitter, sulky and nasty when playing bad. An outburst is fine, break a club if you need, just don't carry it over the rest of the ground.

Though I have to say, having played many different team sports, I understand people getting frustrated, some have different ways to deal with it. Mind you, it could be worse if we were sledging! Imagine how fun match play would be!

[vangator]

This is a 6 year old thread. I remember posting on a thread that was many years old and someone posted he was surprised when he saw the OP's name come up on the screen because he had been dead for several years. I was such a bad putter (still am) years ago, I would never finish a round without snapping my putter. I always had the $2 rummage sale putters. I broke habit that by buying an expensive putter. I wonder what happened to that one? I know I didn't snap it.

[Lihu]

Actually, getting back on topic, it seems like the 20 handicapper is more prone to outbursts of frustrations than a 10 HC. The better you get the less desperate a bad shot becomes. For the 20+ handicap, bad shots mean hitting the ball towards the hole in a less predictable manner than a lower handicap player, and this leads to frustration. I know that the better I've gotten the less frustrating is a bad shot.