People say "nice shot" too soon

[chasm]

I'm with the OP. Telling someone they've hit a good shot when they plainly haven't, is either ignorance or insincerity. Either way, it's not a compliment.

[Golfingdad]

I'm with the OP. Telling someone they've hit a good shot when they plainly haven't, is either ignorance or insincerity. Either way, it's not a compliment.

This (as a blanket statement) is completely incorrect.  It can be ignorance (of your abilities) but it's not insincere and it's definitely an attempt at a compliment (except in my last example, which is ribbing in good fun)  When I play with people I know then I try my best to judge the quality of their shots by their parameters when throwing out compliments.  If my dad puts the ball anywhere remotely near the green on an approach shot, he's probably getting a "nice shot" from me.  (If it ended up in a bunker or heavy rough, I might qualify it a little with a "nice contact" type of specific comment, but it's still good for his abilities and I'm acknowledging it.  If @iacas puts a PW onto the left side of the green when the pin is right and he leaves himself with a 40' putt, he's getting no comment from me because I know that he's not happy with that shot.  If @mvmac dumps one in the pond he'll probably get a sarcastic "nice shot" cuz he's fun to mess with.

@billchao is dead on here ...

It's just about being polite, and what's wrong with that? Somebody is being friendly and trying to acknowledge that they are paying some attention to what you're doing.

People have told me "nice shot" on a mishit that ended up decent. I smile and say thanks.

Sure, sometimes its aggravating when somebody compliments you while you are disgusted from screwing up, but say thanks, and move on.  They had nothing but good intentions.

[chasm]

This (as a blanket statement) is completely incorrect.  It can be ignorance (of your abilities) but it's not insincere and it's definitely an attempt at a compliment (except in my last example, which is ribbing in good fun)  When I play with people I know then I try my best to judge the quality of their shots by their parameters when throwing out compliments.  If my dad puts the ball anywhere remotely near the green on an approach shot, he's probably getting a "nice shot" from me.  (If it ended up in a bunker or heavy rough, I might qualify it a little with a "nice contact" type of specific comment, but it's still good for his abilities and I'm acknowledging it.  If @iacas puts a PW onto the left side of the green when the pin is right and he leaves himself with a 40' putt, he's getting no comment from me because I know that he's not happy with that shot.  If @mvmac dumps one in the pond he'll probably get a sarcastic "nice shot" cuz he's fun to mess with. :-P

OK, but you are talking about situations in which you know the golfers well, and know what constitutes a good shot [i][b]for them.[/i][/b]. In most circumstances, the "nice shot" brigade aren't doing that, they're in the same category as the "youdaman" brigade - just making meaningless supposedly encouraging noises that are entirely unrelated to what is going on. As it happens, while acknowledging your good intentions I also disagree with your approach. As a very moderate golfer myself, the last thing I want is to be complimented on a shot which, while normal for me, I know to be mediocre. It's patronising.  [quote]@billchao is dead on here ... [QUOTE name="billchao" url="/t/75705/people-say-nice-shot-too-soon/0_30#post_1017601"] It's just about being polite, and what's wrong with that? Somebody is being friendly and trying to acknowledge that they are paying some attention to what you're doing. People have told me "nice shot" on a mishit that ended up decent. I smile and say thanks.[/QUOTE] Sure, sometimes its aggravating when somebody compliments you while you are disgusted from screwing up, but say thanks, and move on.  They had nothing but good intentions. [/quote] The road to hell is paved with good intentions. I'm not suggesting one should be rude to people who are trying to be nice. My own response would be something along the lines of "thanks, but actually that was poor".

[Moppy]

Maybe you should translate it to what it really means in most cases: "I wish I could have hit that shot," and it won't bother you so much.

Even David in FL did it while playing with Graeme McDowell:

" Graeme was no more than 130 out after his drive on one. He hit, his second, and from where I was, I could see that it was inside about 15 feet. I gave him a little "shot".....and got just a little bit of the stink-eye in return. Nothing overt, but I definitely noticed. That got my attention and I remembered that his standards from a buck 30 and my own, were worlds apart...

I probably didn't compliment more than 2 or 3 of his shots the rest of the day.......but they deserved it, by any standard! "

[cipher]

Maybe you should translate it to what it really means in most cases: "I wish I could have hit that shot," and it won't bother you so much.

Even David in FL did it while playing with Graeme McDowell:

"Graeme was no more than 130 out after his drive on one. He hit, his second, and from where I was, I could see that it was inside about 15 feet. I gave him a little "shot".....and got just a little bit of the stink-eye in return. Nothing overt, but I definitely noticed. That got my attention and I remembered that his standards from a buck 30 and my own, were worlds apart...

I probably didn't compliment more than 2 or 3 of his shots the rest of the day.......but they deserved it, by any standard!"

You should have told him he was way above average then for a tour player with that shot at 15' from 130.  Clearly he was not aware.

[jetsknicks1]

I'm with the OP. Telling someone they've hit a good shot when they plainly haven't, is either ignorance or insincerity. Either way, it's not a compliment.

Or they could just be polite and are trying to make conversation. Just sayin.

[billchao]

OK, but you are talking about situations in which you know the golfers well, and know what constitutes a good shot [i][b]for them.[/i][/b].As a very moderate golfer myself, the last thing I want is to be complimented on a shot which, while normal for me, I know to be mediocre. It's patronising.

If someone gives you a compliment, it's a compliment. If you don't accept it as a compliment, that's on you. If your playing partners know your game and know you mishit it and said "nice shot," that would be patronizing.

[chasm]

[quote name="chasm" url="/t/75705/people-say-nice-shot-too-soon#post_1017680"] OK, but you are talking about situations in which you know the golfers well, and know what constitutes a good shot [i][b]for them.[/i][/b].As a very moderate golfer myself, the last thing I want is to be complimented on a shot which, while normal for me, I know to be mediocre. It's patronising.

If someone gives you a compliment, it's a compliment. If you don't accept it as a compliment, that's on you. If your playing partners know your game and know you mishit it and said "nice shot," that would be patronizing.[/quote] Well, opinions differ. In my view, telling people that something they have done is good, when it isn't, is undesirable at best, patronising at worst. I feel the same way about the apparent imperative to tell kids how well they're doing, when they aren't. Constructive criticism is what helps people to improve. Saying "that's wonderful" when actually it's a pile of shite doesn't encourage improvement.

[billchao]

Well, opinions differ. In my view, telling people that something they have done is good, when it isn't, is undesirable at best, patronising at worst. I feel the same way about the apparent imperative to tell kids how well they're doing, when they aren't. Constructive criticism is what helps people to improve. Saying "that's wonderful" when actually it's a pile of shite doesn't encourage improvement.

Yea, but if people don't know you, don't know your skill level, don't know your game, and see you hit one on the green, they're going to say "nice shot." Not their fault they don't realize you hit it fat by a groove but managed to get it on because you pulled the wrong club for the wind. Constructive criticism is all well and fine, if people have a base to build on. Again, I'm talking about complete strangers, here. They won't have anything to offer your game save for a few kind words. Accept them graciously, please.

[Dave2512]

Well, opinions differ. In my view, telling people that something they have done is good, when it isn't, is undesirable at best, patronising at worst. I feel the same way about the apparent imperative to tell kids how well they're doing, when they aren't. Constructive criticism is what helps people to improve. Saying "that's wonderful" when actually it's a pile of shite doesn't encourage improvement.

I think it's more a perception thing. What's bad to you may be good to others, regarding golf. I am a terrible golfer but often get paired with the 100+ folks that rarely hit a good drive. If I hit a 3w wood in the fairway and I'm still 169 out on a tight 410 par 4 it's still usually a lot further than their drives, they practically applaud. Then there's the etiquette, people tend to get overly polite on the course when you are paired with them. It never seems to be cheerleading to me.

Scores are the same thing. If I shoot an 86 I feel like pulling my hair out because usually it's a couple of stupid mistakes that get me there so disappointing. To the people with me struggling to keep it under 55 a side that's like magic golf. If I get a compliment I say thanks, it's the polite thing to do.

[vangator]

My golfing partners usually say &*&%$#* when I hit a nice shot.

[chasm]

My golfing partners usually say &*&%$#* when I hit a nice shot.

LOL. Mine too. Maybe this accounts for my sourness...

[rehmwa]

I think I'll start randomly commenting just for fun.

"Nice shot" for nice shots and the occasional mediocre one just to mix it up

"well, that one sucked" just a randomly scattered about once every other hole should do it

Half of these I think I'll just be looking off to the south too just to really set it up.

Maybe about a third of them put in just a 'barely' perception sarcastic tone, so MAYBE or Maybe NOT they'll have to decide if it's really in the tone or not

One or two at most jump up and down and buy the guy a drink for a shot.

the more serious and somber the golfer the better.....

report back in a week - if the world is not available for one's personal entertainment, then it's a crappy world.

(I also prefer it when I hit a good shot and my friends mutter and swear under their breath - I KNOW that's sincere)

[cipher]

People care way too much about what others say on the golf course.  I guess I need to start messing with people more.

[Strandly]

People care way too much about what others say on the golf course.  I guess I need to start messing with people more.

I did this a couple times last year when I got paired with strangers.  They'd hit a junk shot and be like.. "Dammit!" and rather than try to offer some mindless consolation I'd deadpan "Yeah that was pretty terrible".  I always thought I was being kinda funny coming from a stranger but the reaction from my group was less clear since nobody ever laughed or got mad.  Anyway, I only did this to people who I thought could take a joke because obviously this sort of thing could backfire horrifically.  If I play with friends or family I'm a pretty ruthless troll.

This thread has been brought to you by the number 6, the letter Q, and the douchebags at PGA events that scream GET IN THE HOLE a half a second after someone tees off on a 700 yard par 5.

[dnaygs]

I'm more curious as to why people feel compelled to say anything at all.  It's a very common social convention.  People have a very hard time staying quiet around other people.  Try walking past someone you know in your office and not saying hi.  I think it's more of a social compulsion than anything else.  They need to say something, and "nice shot" is a pretty easy and innocuous thing to say.  I've played with people that say it literally every single shot, like it's just part of their pre or post shot routine to say nice shot for the other player.  Personally I don't have a problem just being quiet, but some people are obviously uncomfortable doing so.

[saevel25]

I've had people get angry at me when they say "nice shot" and I reply "not really, I thinned that" then they'll say "well I'd be happy with that shot" or something similar... So I just say thanks now.

Yea I do that as well. I am more angry with myself on a bad shot, and I know people see the end result and try to be nice. They might think I am angry at them for not responding or sounding snide when I say something like, "No that sucked", but it was more of me reacting to what I call bad contact. Like hitting a thin heely drive. I HATE the feeling of that drive, yet the result is usually decent.

This (as a blanket statement) is completely incorrect.  It can be ignorance (of your abilities) but it's not insincere and it's definitely an attempt at a compliment (except in my last example, which is ribbing in good fun)  When I play with people I know then I try my best to judge the quality of their shots by their parameters when throwing out compliments.  If my dad puts the ball anywhere remotely near the green on an approach shot, he's probably getting a "nice shot" from me.  (If it ended up in a bunker or heavy rough, I might qualify it a little with a "nice contact" type of specific comment, but it's still good for his abilities and I'm acknowledging it.  If @iacas puts a PW onto the left side of the green when the pin is right and he leaves himself with a 40' putt, he's getting no comment from me because I know that he's not happy with that shot.  If @mvmac dumps one in the pond he'll probably get a sarcastic "nice shot" cuz he's fun to mess with.

I don't say nice shot when the ball doesn't end up on the green, I usually say something like, "That will be OK, you can got an easy chip". I want to say something positive about it, I mean it was a nGIR from 180 yards!!!

Heck @iacas can hit a recovery shot to about 15 feet and he doesn't get a word from me. Talk about someone who complained about not hearing "Nice Shot"!

[mcanadiens]

I'm more curious as to why people feel compelled to say anything at all.  It's a very common social convention.  People have a very hard time staying quiet around other people.  Try walking past someone you know in your office and not saying hi.  I think it's more of a social compulsion than anything else.  They need to say something, and "nice shot" is a pretty easy and innocuous thing to say.  I've played with people that say it literally every single shot, like it's just part of their pre or post shot routine to say nice shot for the other player.  Personally I don't have a problem just being quiet, but some people are obviously uncomfortable doing so.

Yeah. I like this. Silence is golden. It's platinum when I'm playing like crap.