Should a group be allowed to decline to be paired with others?

[DaveP043]

After reading a bit of the "single golfer" thread, I'm wondering about the idea of a string of singles on the course, or other similar situations .  So my question, you've reserved a time as a single or a two-ball.  You get to the course, and the staff wants to pair you with additional people in order to make as many four-balls as possible.  Should you be forced to accept this, or should you be allowed to decline?

As a clarification, I don't intend this to apply where there are lots of open tee times, but rather to those times when the tee sheet is mostly or completely full.  

As a note, one place where a group is specifically allowed to decline is at the Old Course in St Andrews.  You can have a tee time for two or more players.  You can decline to accept additional players if you choose.  I think its pretty rude, sometimes singles will wait starting at 4 or 5 AM trying to get paired up, but it does happen.

Edited August 3, 2016 by DaveP043
clarified the question, i hope

[drmevo]

I don't think you should be allowed to decline, unless that means waiting for a later time when the course isn't full. As a single, the expectation is that you might have to play with others. If you mean that you'd be expected to pay for the original tee time you had either way, then I'm not sure.  I could see if you were teaching a beginner or something, not wanting to hold anyone else up and being willing to wait for a later time. 

[NJpatbee]

The only experience I have had with a group refusing to be paired up was with a threesome of Japanese businessmen who insisted only playing only with Japanese players to the starter.  I told the starter that I would rather not be uncomfortable be he convinced all of us to play as long as I had my own cart.  I had no real conversation with the businessmen since I could not speak their language but by the time we finished at 18 there were smiles all around - golf does that. 

As a rule I believe that a group should be paired with other golfers if there is room in their tee time.

[CarlSpackler]

I voted no, but it really depends on how busy the course is. My thought is, why would you want to decline? I love meeting new people. Being new to the Orlando area, I have already met a few really cool people just by heading to the golf course.

[RayG]

Grey area... Maybe at Private Club you can pick and choose, but no chance should be allowed at a public course. I am reminded of a thread from a while ago about a single who wouldn't pair up with the 2 or 3 on the tee. No room ahead since it was full, but single didn't want to play with anyone and insisted he play as a single.  The course needs to fill out the sheets. Now- a 3 some in front of a single is essentially a foursome on the books, but there is a window of 8-10 minutes that COULD be filled with another 4some. 

Over my 40+ years I think I have been snubbed twice as a single. One group just said "we'd rather not..." no explanation or whatever. I played with a 3 some 2 groups behind them. I think I figured why they'd 'rather not'. Our group played through by the 4th hole.

[Golfingdad]

I vote no for a couple of reasons.  Number 1, just because you reserved a tee time for a twosome does not mean that the other pair that is joining didn't also.  The computer tee time systems at all of the courses around here require you to enter the number of players and when you enter "2," it doesn't give you the whole tee time, but rather just those two.  If I log on afterwards, the tee time is still available for a twosome.  The time doesn't "belong" to either pair any more than the other.  Incidentally, almost unanimously, the courses out here will not allow singles to reserve tee times. So if you reserve as a threesome, then you have acquired the entire slot.  And that brings me to me next and most important point:

I have played as a single quite a few times in my life, and I have played as part of a group that had a single join us, or two twosomes, or a twosome with two singles (even played once as 4 singles getting paired up) etc ... point is that I've played with strangers more times than I can count.  And I have .............

wait for it ................

.................. never, repeat, NEVER, had a negative experience with strangers.  No arguments over music, cigars, alcohol, ball marks, rules, or whatever other nonsense seems to be documented in so many threads on TST.  No fist fights, no nothing.  The worst of the experiences has been "indifferent" and the best have had me making new golf buddies to play with again.

[Fourputt]

As long as they pay all four fees, then I don't know of a course that would have a problem with that.  It would show them to be jerks, but there's a lot of that going around anyway.

[CarlSpackler]

To add to this, I always try to consolidate groups even while on the course. I asked the twosome that I hooked up with a few weekends ago if they minded if another single who came up behind us on the back nine joined up. In essence, that collapsed the grouping on the course and helped speed things up behind us.

[imsys0042]

I voted no, based on the description.   I believe that in general if the course can accommodate without a delay that you should be able to refuse playing with someone.   However a busy course is a busy course.   You have to adapt.

I will say that if you are paying $200 for a round somewhere and they look like real idiots then you should have some way to avoid the pairing, but in general no.

I think I've refused to play with someone a couple of times only, in 30 years.   Two guys with beers in their hands at 9am and sharing a bag?  Yeah....   On the other hand I've had a number of people turn me away.  Mostly because they think I'm going to be uptight or a really good player (I'm not uptight and consider myself a pretty OK one, not great).  I don't have any hangups about the ability of the people I am playing with, but I've had a number of people see me head for the back tees and tell me to just go ahead without them.

Interesting footnote though.  When I joined my CC I was shoved around the tee sheet a bit.   I didn't know anyone and was shy about booking a tee time with someone in case they didn't like it (I wasn't shy about joining up with people on the first tee or on the course though).  The pro shop would pair me with someone else to get another tee time and unfortunately several times the people I was paired with joined up with other people on their own and I left without getting to play.  Not a great situation.

[saevel25]

14 minutes ago, Golfingdad said:

Number 1, just because you reserved a tee time for a twosome does not mean that the other pair that is joining didn't also.

Really, courses do not do a good job in saying that you could be required to be paired up with another group. Most of the time I think people assume that the entire tee time is theirs even if they have only 1,2, or 3 people. 

It might be better to phrase it, "Reserve up to 4 of the slots at this time". Then have a disclaimer saying that the course shall fill any unreserved slots as needed. 

For me if the course is not crowded then I don't see why a course should force groups to pair up if they don't want to.  If the course is going to be packed then yea they should be required to pair up. 

[CarlSpackler]

Some exceptions would be if it were an ex or someone that you have a restraining order taken out on.

[Shindig]

As a regular at public courses, no you can't.  You can request to be moved, but if they can't move you, your choices are play then or don't play. 

[Golfingdad]

7 minutes ago, saevel25 said:

Most of the time I think people assume that the entire tee time is theirs even if they have only 1,2, or 3 people. 

Seems like if they've played golf more than a couple of times in theirlife, they'd know that the only way to guarantee that they're not getting paired up with others is to bring 4 people.  There are obviously ways to make it more likely that you don't get paired up - like playing on weekdays, or on late afternoons, or whatever - but never any guarantees.  (I'm talking about public courses only, BTW)

[Patch]

I voted no. I have been on both sides of that situation. As a twosome being told to accept a single, or twosome, and as a single, or twosome being put with another group. 

Usually the only time this scenario takes place is when there is a starter involved, and the first tee is starting to back up. The starter has a job to do, and we as golfers should realize this person has that job to do. That job is to speed up play, and keep things moving a long. 

I maybe wrong, but this topic seems to me to be another question  relating to pace of play. 

I have seen it when no starter was involved, where golfers on their own helped get each other get out faster. These golfers put the spirit of play up front. 

Now if farther into a round it comes to the point where the mix isn't working, then of course some kind of split is most likely the thing to do. Go your separate ways at the turn. 

In the end we are all there to just play golf. We, unless decided otherwise, are there to apply our skill level against the course. Not each other. I still maintain that golfers who allow others to manipulate them, and blame others for their poor play, have a lot of room for mental improvement of their own golf game. 

I have met, and made a lot new friends during my time golfing, when getting paired up with new folks to me.  Even made a few business deals, I normally wouldn't have known about.

Golf is suppose to be fun and relaxing. You should just play it. 

Edited August 3, 2016 by Patch

[Vinny Cap]

If you look at it from the golfers side and you think your S#&% don't stink then I can see you thinking "I booked the slot and it is all mine!" And that is fair if you booked a foursome.  If you didn't book a foursome then unless you paid for all 4 green fees, you are subject to adding a golfer or two as the started sees fit.  This usually depends on how booked they are.

I usually play as a twosome and we have been paired up with singles and twosomes and I have never had any issues.  We usually chat it up and have some fun.  The only thing that gets me are the ones not fixing their pitch marks but we covered that in another thread.

If you look at it from the golf course side, they can and want to fill 4 golfers in every 8 - 10 mins to make max $$$ per hour.  Hey, its a business and if YOU owned a course you would do the exact same thing.  So if someone was unwilling to get paired up I would say they can pay for all 4 green fees or go play somewhere else.

[imsys0042]

25 minutes ago, saevel25 said:

Really, courses do not do a good job in saying that you could be required to be paired up with another group. Most of the time I think people assume that the entire tee time is theirs even if they have only 1,2, or 3 people. 

 

Probably the same kind of people who think they are entitled to something on the course because their handicap is lower, or some other silly garbage.   I never thought that, even at my club (i'm starting to sound like a broken record, but they are very arrogant and silly) where a lot of members act like that, I never thought I "owned" the time.   Some people put TBD to prevent others from using the time, but I rarely ever do.

 

[Hardspoon]

Just now, Vinny Cap said:

If you didn't book a foursome then unless you paid for all 4 green fees, you are subject to adding a golfer or two as the started sees fit.  This usually depends on how booked they are.

That's what I voted for - if you want to pay for all four slots, go right ahead...then you've paid for the right to not be paired up (you've also paid for the right to look like a douchebag).

51 minutes ago, Golfingdad said:

And I have .............

wait for it ................

.................. never, repeat, NEVER, had a negative experience with strangers.  No arguments over music, cigars, alcohol, ball marks, rules, or whatever other nonsense seems to be documented in so many threads on TST.  No fist fights, no nothing.  The worst of the experiences has been "indifferent" and the best have had me making new golf buddies to play with again.

Yup, this is exactly my experience as well.

On a side note, I actually don't like playing as a single.  I'll actually tell the starter that I'd rather he pair me up...I've skipped open slots to wait for a tee time with another threesome.

[Piz]

No.  As long as it is understood that you are booking slots rather than times.