29 Signs You Take Golf Too Seriously

[iacas]

29 signs you might be taking golf too seriously

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Shrinks refer to it as “over-compensation” — an excessive, awkward effort to prove that you belong. It happens in the bedroom and the boardroom. It also happens on the tee box. Are you trying too hard to demonstrate your...

They are:

1. You’ve Instagrammed a photo of yourself in a hide-bound club chair, flipping through a Bernard Shaw book while sipping a rare Scotch.
2. You have a groove-cleaning brush dangling from your bag.
3. NASCAR drivers wear fewer logos.
4. You wear spikes to Topgolf.
5. You have no less than two dozen bag tags clipped to your bag, all from Top 100 courses.
6. You employ a rangefinder for greenside pitches.
7. What’s with the white pants? And the white belt? “I never miss 12-footers. Must be this new grip. Also, sweet belt, bro."
8. You ask your caddie to read the grain.
9. You name-drop famous clubs that you don’t belong to, using their nicknames. As in, “PV was cool but I preferred Shinny.”
10. You bark “Be the right club today!” at your ball, without irony.
11. You swear you never play this badly. Ever.
12. You rarely repair a ballmark without saying, “Always leave the course in better condition than when you found it.”
13. You use the phrase, “the great game of golf.”
14. You pressure playing partners into gambling when they don’t want to. “It’s only 50 bucks a hole. What’s the big deal?”
15. You distinguish between a “hard seven” and a “stock seven.”
16. You don’t play competitively but still carry alignment sticks.
17. You are fond of informing people that golf is an entirely different game in Scotland.
18. You own a golf cart with a vanity plate.
19. You own iron covers.
20. You ask, “This good?” when nothing is at stake.
21. What’s with the plus-fours?
22. You ask the starter what the greens are stimping at.
23. You have an instructor on speed-dial, and you call him mid-round.
24. You don’t just know your launch angle, spin rate and smash factor; you speak of them. Often.
25. You charge to the back tees with no regard for yardage.
26. After missing a consequential putt, you won’t talk to your playing partners for nine holes.
27. You’re on record saying, “Pine Valley is the better design, but Cypress Point is more fun.”
28. You regularly quote lines from “Golf in the Kingdom.”
29. You refer to him as “Mr. Hogan.”

[mdl]

I've never actually said "Be the right club today!", but I totally unironically yell "Be right!" when I hit one that's tracking right on the pin.  That's probably the most embarrassing one for me.

I might have to slap someone who said Mr. Hogan non-ironically.  Thankfully I've never heard that in person...

[iacas]

7 minutes ago, iacas said:

1. No
2. You have a groove-cleaning brush dangling from your bag.
3. No
4. No
5. No
6. No
7. What’s with the white pants? And the white belt? “I never miss 12-footers. Must be this new grip. Also, sweet belt, bro."
8. No
9. No
10. No
11. No
12. No
13. No
14. No
15. No
16. No
17. No
18. No
19. You own iron covers.
20. No
21. No
22. No
23. No
24. No
25. No
26. No
27. No
28. No
29. No

2. I have a club brush for cleaning my clubs. They're the Frogger ones we got at the 2017 Newport Cup. I use ball washers on occasion, too, despite how "not pro" it looks. 😄

7. I have one… yeah, one white belt. Maybe two.  They're just the Mission belts. I wear them, still.

19. I have iron covers. They're nice, rubbery, and I use them… only when I travel, so my iron heads aren't rattling around smashing into each other when traveling. They never come out of the travel case - which is where I keep them right now, even so they're there with the travel case when I need them.

[DaveP043]

I do have and use the club brush, and I've said something like "Be good" or "Be right".  Not as often as I'd like, to be honest.  I guess I'm not completely insane.  Maybe.

[Patch]

I went with 1-3, but "none" is probably a more accurate answer for me. I just figured some where in my past I probably did 1-3 of those things listed. 

In my present golf reality, I basically just hit/putt the ball when playing for a score. It's a relaxing game for me. Being serious about it, would not collide well with the relaxation part, to my way of thinking. 

I am more serious when practicing. Not by much, but a little more. 

[David in FL]

I’ve absolutely yelled something along the lines of “be right!”  On rare occasion, I’ve also used a rangefinder for a longish pitch.  Say 40-50 yards...

No others though.

[boogielicious]

I have actually said, “Be the right club today” knowing full well where it came from.

i have a brush and it’s on a spring loaded string. 😀

[nevets88]

I listen to the NoLayingUp podcast which has the Hal Sutton be the right club and it's wearing on me, strike me on that one.

I regret using Shinny in my Instagram posts of USO swing vids, I was too lazy to type out the whole name.

I carry alignment sticks.

I distinguish between stock and hard 7s, whether they go as far as I want them to is a different story.

 

 

[ChetlovesMer]

Okay I'm guilty of pulling out a rangefinder on 40-50 yard pitch shots. Otherwise, I'm in pretty good shape. I've always said if you wear a white belt OR white pants you'd better be in the navy, selling ice cream, a painter, or a female pop singer. I strongly dislike the white pants, and REALLY can't stand the white belt. A golf buddy of mine wears one and the rest of us continually mock him. 

[iacas]

17 minutes ago, ChetlovesMer said:

Okay I'm guilty of pulling out a rangefinder on 40-50 yard pitch shots. Otherwise, I'm in pretty good shape. I've always said if you wear a white belt OR white pants you'd better be in the navy, selling ice cream, a painter, or a female pop singer. I strongly dislike the white pants, and REALLY can't stand the white belt. A golf buddy of mine wears one and the rest of us continually mock him. 

I might have to wear mine tomorrow then.

It's just a belt, and if it matches a color in your shirt, your shoes/socks, and your hat… it fits.

[ChetlovesMer]

1 minute ago, iacas said:

I might have to wear mine tomorrow then.

It's just a belt, and if it matches a color in your shirt, your shoes/socks, and your hat… it fits.

We call our white belt wearing buddy "Bogey Spears", or "Katy Par-y". 

[DrMJG]

Cleaning brush and iron covers that are off when I am playing.

[Wanzo]

3.  Groove cleaning brush, white shorts (if that counts), hard 7 iron.  

[DeadMan]

I have a groove cleaning brush, but that's it. I will say "be right" occasionally, but I don't go full Halimoney.

[Vinsk]

7. I have two white belts and usually wear white shorts. Usually white shoes so the belt looks fine to me.

16. I carry alignment sticks. 

[cutchemist42]

Only 1 really, I use driveway markers for practise that I bought from Home Depot as alignment sticks 

[Benit0]

I have a groove cleaning brush and I do check my phone gps for distance on pitch shoot, I even check the start and end of the green yardage.

[3jacker]

I have a groove brush, alignment sticks and have a white belt laying around somewhere.