Etiquette

[Ping g]

I get upset when I take my wife golfing and men use foul language. Not the little words but the big ones!(we all know the ones iam talking about

[chilepepper]

Don’t sweat the small stuff. Yes it’s crude a heck but I’m sure she’s heard it all before. 

It would help if you could find a few like minded folks to join you thus avoiding most of it

[Buckeyebowman]

I can find it embarrassing even in an all male group. I have a buddy who, on occasion, will go off like a volcano! True, he's just cussing at himself for making a poor shot, but sometimes you can hear him 2 fairways over.

However, one time we paired up with a couple of lady golfers because the course was crowded. We made the offer and they accepted, although we could tell they were a little reticent. My friend was on his best behavior. Not a cuss word the whole round! I even gave a tip (after asking permission) to one of the women that helped her out.

After the round they shook our hands and thanked us for an enjoyable round. That's how it oughta be.

WHEW!

[Ping g]

Iam sure she has heard it before I'm no angel! Thank you for everyone output. I think there is a time and place for it like I said iam no angel but there is a time to be gentlemen

[NM Golf]

Don't take your wife to play golf then. I go to the golf course to get away from my wife, you should try it. There is actually a guy I used to play with all the time who got married and now refuses to go anywhere without his significant other. Haven't played with him in over a year.

I'm not saying everyone should scream expletives after each missed shot but it happens.

I am sure I will take it on the chin for that comment, 3, 2, 1...let the condemnation begin.

Edited December 28, 2017 by NM Golf

[Ping g]

True but I like to golf with her! Just got to deal with it!!

[dennyjones]

I can understand an occasional outburst but if it seems to be common, I'll find other people that have better self control.   If it's from another group, there isn't much you can do about it 

but....

ask the guy that was fined in Michigan a couple of years ago for swearing up a storm on a river tubing excursion.   He was arrested for violating a local ordinance and fined, I believe about $1200.   

[gregsandiego]

2 hours ago, chilepepper said:

Don’t sweat the small stuff. Yes it’s crude a heck but I’m sure she’s heard it all before. 

It would help if you could find a few like minded folks to join you thus avoiding most of it

Best solution!

[Lihu]

3 hours ago, Ping g said:

I get upset when I take my wife golfing and men use foul language. Not the little words but the big ones!(we all know the ones iam talking about

Of course you get upset. Anyone who doesn't treat a lady like a lady on a golf course is pretty much ignorant. It would bug me if someone uses coarse language around my wife or daughter. I suppose if they utter an expletive under their breath at a bad shot, I wouldn't have any objections, but to use it in normal conversation is just plain dumb.

There are many husband wife groups on my home courses. Most people are respectful of each other as it is and don't use foul language in normal conversation. Most of the better golfers don't even use could language.

For some odd reason, the members of the men's club in my home town's course go way out of their way to use coarse language. It's really awkward, but only at their meetings which turned me and @hacker101 off to joining them.

 

[jsgolfer]

My wife swears like a sailor on the golf course.  Way worse than most men.  

[Eric C]

It's how you feel, and you're entitled to that feeling, but I don't get it at all. 

Cursing is as much a part of our culture as anything else, and you can find the most vulgar of language on TV and in the written press at all levels.  It's just spoken language and emotion, and golf is an emotional sport as much as any other. In general I would like to think my speech is educated enough to make my point without cursing, but I'll drop an F-Bomb as needed and not give it a second thought regardless of who is around.  And lest you think I wouldn't do this at work, as a well educated business executive and leader, you're wrong. It's simply a mechanism for one to express a point or emotion, nothing more.

The PGA will fine a pro if he's caught on TV, of course, but that's because the FCC continues to maintain their out-dated puritanical views on the matter.

[mcanadiens]

15 minutes ago, Eric C said:

Cursing is as much a part of our culture as anything else

Maybe I'm just around a rough group most of the time, but sure feels that way these days.

I'll swear when I'm pissed and, yes, that does happen on the golf course. People I know swear in casual conversation, in public, in front of women, children, old people and in church. They aren't mad. It isn't even really adding to whatever they are saying. It's just an extra word that gets thrown into the sentence.

[Marty2019]

I don't understand why so-called "curse words" are unacceptable, when you can say the exact same thing using a different word, and that's okay.  

Excrement!   Sex act!   Woman's private parts!  

Those above are acceptable, and yet they are the exact same thing as the related curse words, and everyone knows it!   It's just weird that the so-called "curse words" are unacceptable for some reason. 

[coachjimsc]

2 hours ago, jsgolfer said:

My wife swears like a sailor on the golf course.  Way worse than most men.  

Haven't met your wife yet and I already like her. 

[rehmwa]

two parties involved here:

1 - the swearer - he can notice he's being an a$$ and just stop because it's the courteous thing to do

2 - the offended - they can notice they are being a snowflake and they can just ignore it and enjoy the round despite

the key part here is both parties can make a tiny change to their OWN behavior/response and the issue goes away - they can also ask the other if they'd modify their behavior ("can you turn down the swearing?") or excuse their behavior ("sorry about the cursing, it's an old habit.  Do you mind?"), but that actually requires talking to someone

what each can't do is force the OTHER person to change their behavior

what's frustrating is watching two groups sit around and gripe and wait for the other to 'change first'

 

personally - I don't consider (excessive)  foul language to be a necessary thing and consider it a reflection of weak character or poor ability to communicate.  But I don't much care unless to other person leans on it so much to look like a fool, or they do it on purpose for childish shock value.

[Patch]

I tend to laugh at such outbursts by others when they get on the cuss train. It's cheap entertainment. That's not to say I have not used some bad language myself. I do try to do it quietly though. Cussing is a normal thing  for some folks I have found. I'd rather golfers cuss a little than throw a club in anger. 

My wife and had this little interaction with guy while golfing. We stopped at little course we knew about along I-15 in Utah. We were paired with another man and his wife. The guy was really having a bad day with his putter. At one point he missed another short putt. In a calm, sort of way, he looked up at the sky, dropped an "F" bomb on God, produced his middle finger, and called the almighty an S.O. B.. His wife was totally embarrassed at his actions. My wife being the Lady she is, politely asked the guy if God was his putting/swing instructor? Again, in a calm sort away the man replied "not anymore, I just fired her ass". 

At that point, we all broke out laughing. Amazingly the guy started making  putts after that. 

[GolfLug]

I think a couple of swear words a round are cathartic. Too much swearing (after every other shot or something..) has always seemed like blame sharing with luck as a major factor in your poor play. 

I don't swear around women in general unless I know they are fine with it. 

My wife is cool with swearing. 

 

[DaveP043]

1 hour ago, GolfLug said:

My wife is cool with swearing. 

Your wife is just cool, I don't know how she got stuck with you.  As for swearing, I find that its most effective when used in very limited quantities.  Continual use of those same few words betrays a rather limited vocabulary, in my view.  There are much more creative ways to verbally castigate a misbehaving club, or ball, or the wind, or the green, or.....well certainly not myself!