Can a marriage between an avid golfer and a non-golfer work?

[PEZGolf]

Let us hear your experience or opinion. Here is what Walter Hagen's second wife, Edna Strauss, said after their divorce:    "Unless a woman is a golf addict herself, she should NEVER marry a confirmed golfer. It can only go on the rocks. Walter lived golf, asleep and awake. Before dinner and after, he was practicing strokes in the living room.".

Here is a counterpoint:  my wife and I have been married  for 36 years. I am a real golf enthusiast.  She does not play in spite of coaxing by me. Our son, daughter, and grand daughter not only play, but also are enthusiasts!  My wife has not only accepted this, but is proud of us. What is your opinion or experience?

[DaveP043]

I married a non-golfer, back in 1984.  Apparently I've infected her, she plays as much or more than I do.

[PEZGolf]

4 minutes ago, DaveP043 said:

I married a non-golfer, back in 1984.  Apparently I've infected her, she plays as much or more than I do.

Congratulations! That is great!

[inthehole]

I got the best of both worlds ... neither my wife or I ever golfed when we got married.    We're late bloomers (no kids) & took the sport up together & she's (almost) as avid as I am ... never have to worry about her not wanting to play.    It's truly a great couples activity ... but seems both have to be avid for it to work

[Grumpter]

As with most every other thing in life there is no easy one answer fits all situations.

[RussUK]

1 minute ago, Grumpter said:

As with most every other thing in life there is no easy one answer fits all situations.

+1.

My wife "tolerates" my golf obsession. its the whole "you should have seen the approach shot to the 10th, eat your heart out Rory" "thats nice dear". 

[RayG]

Lucked out... I am an "avid" golfer, but not to extremes. My wife HATES the game. She was brought up in Ireland and forced to play those pitch and putt courses that are all over the place over there. When she left, it was good riddance as far as she was concerned. We'll go to the beach in the morning, and we will leave to go over a friends place, and he and I will go out and play somewhere while she hangs by the pool with his wife. Or, I will play on Saturday while she goes to work.

She has only been on course with me once. We met up with my parents early in our relationship in Myrtle Beach and went to play with them. The only way I could get her to come along was to let her drive the cart. She brought a book and her own little stash of Vodka. She would keep up with general conversation but had absolutely no interest in golf related matters. But she WOULD laugh if one of us had a real clanker.

[isukgolf]

I made sure with wife 3.0 that I got the unlimited golf option ... its not always an option that you can get off the local self ... I had to wait till wife 3.0 was available ...

Prior versions of wife would not have tolerated as much golf as I play ... thus the upgrades ...

Warning:  Read the label on wife 2.0 close ... while wife 2.0 claims golf is included in the package ... the small print says golf only on approved days ...

 

 

[Patch]

My wife and I have been married for several decades now. She did/does not golf enough to be considered a golfer. If anything she was a "Putter", which is of course another story. She can also become Parnelli Jones when she drives a cart. Again, another story. 

The fact that I golfed, and she didn't has had no ill effect on our marriage. We do so much other stuff together is probably the reason why.  We both worked and retired as professionals. These days my wife encourages me to continue to be active, and golf is one my favorite activities. When I go hiking she is usally with me with her cameras. 

We just recently returned from vacation in Mexico. While I was out golfing, my wife was sight seeing, visiting friends,  and shopping. 

[gogolfing]

My wife and I have been married for 21 years....and she is a non-golfer. I gave her some lessons for Christmas seven or eight years ago and she never really liked it. Once a year we go to the local pitch and putt and do a family golf outing but that is all she wants to do. 

 

If I am playing 9 after dinner when the course is quiet she will come out for a walk with me which is nice, but she is an avid gardener and she is more interested in what the course super is doing with the grounds! She encourages me to get out lots which is appreciated and makes a few of my friends jealous.

Edited December 23, 2015 by gogolfing

[SavvySwede]

Avid female golfers in my age bracket might as well be unicorns. I think I'll be okay so long as I find one that doesn't want kids; they're the real culprits I've been told.

[mvmac]

Added a poll. 

I voted yes, celebrating 9 years today.

There are a lot of tour wives that rarely play and most of those guys seem to stay married. 

[pganapathy]

Wifey is OK with me golfing, but every now and again I get the "why do you want to golf tomorrow" when I suggest it.  Still, provided she is busy and there is nothing else I need to do, she is OK with me golfing.  Overall a pretty good compromise so no complaints.

For me the key is understanding and compromise from both parties for this to work

[chspeed]

Absolutely. Been married over 10 years and the only golf course my wife likes are ones with 3 hour rounds so I can get home fast . She even tolerates the golf mirror in the living room! The only guilt-trip I get is from our daughter, who knows how to twist the knife by saying things like "that's OK, I understand that golf is more important to you than spending time with me."

Edited December 23, 2015 by chspeed

[Ernest Jones]

As long as the golfer isn't a dick about it and remembers that they're not the only one in the relationship it should work just fine. 

[dennyjones]

I've been married 36 years and my wife is good with my golf.   I golf about 3 times per week and she goes to the yoga studio on her own.    She has no interest in golf.   She tried it in college and didn't like it.   I believe people need an activity outside of the "couples" activities that is just their own.    We spend a lot of time together doing other things but not golf.  

I'm getting ready to retire in the spring and I told her a golf membership is in my future and she encouraged that.   Good woman.

[No Mulligans]

Most of my rounds of golf I play without my wife.  Pretty much all of her golf rounds she plays with me.  Riddle me that batman.

I think it's healthy to have some time away from each other.

 

[stealthhwk]

I voted yes, but it can be a slippery path. Keys are compromise and keeping priorities straight. Family comes above ALL else. Things ive learned on the subject; keep priorities straight, do things to cutback like play shorter courses, executive courses or just nine holes from time to time. And it also helps to marry the greatest woman the earth has ever seen.